Can Nice Guys Transform into Hunters?
Jan 04
Late last year I had an awesome telephone conversation with Mike Weinberg. During our call, I admitted that I have never develop great hunting skills for business development. What he said in response really caused me to think,
“That doesn’t surprise me; you’re too nice.”
I was stumped. What did he mean by that? Does that mean nice sales people can’t become hunters? Did he think I was weak and ineffective? A multitude of thoughts raced through my head.
A few days later I repeated this conversation to a close friend and we discussed people in a similar field who we view as good hunters. Although each person is friendly I don’t think anyone would use the word ‘nice’ to describe them.
For several weeks I asked myself if nice guys can actually transform into hunters. What is the difference between a nice sales person and an effective hunter? A subsequent conversation with Mike Weinberg revealed the key difference.
Hunters aren’t afraid of conflict whereas nice sales people usually try to avoid conflict.
Ah-ha!
In terms of hunting for new business, conflict arises when the sales person pushes for an appointment or a meeting even after they have been told no several times. Conflict occurs when a prospect is ready to disconnect the call but the hunter keeps them on the line by asking another question. Conflict happens when a nice sales person senses they are intruding on the other person’s time and rather than ignoring it, they succumb to it.
That got me thinking…
What is it about conflict and rejection that bothers nice sales people so much?
The primary reason is that it goes against their natural and instinctive desire to be liked and accepted by others. It doesn’t matter if the other person is a complete stranger nice people want—and need—to be liked. Here’s a personal example.
Shortly after I first began issuing my weekly newsletter in 2002, I received an email from someone objecting to a comment I made. I can admit it now that I almost freaked out. I was stressed out the entire day thinking that I had offended one of my readers. I failed to realize that controversy is perfectly acceptable and that it is impossible for me to please everyone. It sounds silly but that type of situation happens regularly for nice sales people.
I can just hear hunters as they read this. “C’mon! Suck it up!” “Grow a pair will ya!” “It’s just prospecting, it’s not personal.” “Get a backbone why don’tchya!” That’s easy for Driver-type personalities. They don’t take ANYTHING personal and the only thing they care about is getting results and not failing.
So, let’s go back to my original question…
Can nice sales people transform themselves into good hunters?
I believe the answer is yes. My good friend Mike suggests that a friendly, process-driven person CAN learn how to hunt and reject the rejection. However, it takes a significant amount of work, effort and energy, not mention daily practice. It requires regular coaching, dedicated focus and the ability to work while feeling uncomfortable. This is not an easy task for a relationship oriented sales person. However, it is achievable.
And, if a nice sales person is willing to make the necessary commitment to changing, they may just transform their business.
Kelley my friend,
Great post. Great dialogue with you. Thanks for sharing the story. You wrote that better than I ever could, and I love your take on it.
We are all different and have our unique giftedness and approach. I agree with your conclusion: high-relaters can be good hunters, especially because they are usually great at following process – IF (big IF), they remind themselves to push past resistance. The reality is that there is lots of resistance when we’re pursuing new accounts. Those that are good at overcoming that automatic resistance prospect throw out tend to be more successful.
After re-reading your post again, I love the fact that you simply addressed the topic head on. A lot of trainers and coaches don’t want to tackle the topic because they get paid to train and coach and it’s not good for business to tell a large percentage of the population that they likely won’t succeed in new business development.
Thanks for sharing your great content and for the wisdom you’ve been sharing with me personally. Much appreciated Kelley!
Mike
This is a great conversation. So many times we hear our clients say when hiring “I am going to hire some agressive, hungry reps who will just pound the phones”. Okay… that works some of the time…
In actuality they are short sheeting themselves. There are fabulous hunters out there who are nice and build amazing relationships. But, they do so based on exactly what you said – they follow a well thought out process and deliver high value to their buyers. The rub comes when organizations think throwing energy at a sales process will work as opposed to creating a relevant sales process supported by the right content and tools.
Diversity in a sales team matters and it goes way beyond ethnic diversity. You need different personalities and skills to build a team that rocks. Thanks for making me think about this!
Hi Kelley,
Really enjoyed your post – thanks for sharing your conversation with Mike and your subsequent thoughts. I agree with your conclusion. I find that when people understand that a large percentage of Selling is process-driven then it becomes easier to remove some of the fear of rejection.
All the best,
Richard.
Trish, I couldn’t agree with you more. Diversity on a sales team is essential in today’s business climate.
Richard, focusing on process–while simple in nature–is challenging for some personality styles. However, it can certainly make a difference.
Thanks for taking the time to comment.
Cheers!
Great post Kelley and great view points from everyone since.
I can only say from my experience in professional service selling that you don’t have to be nice or not nice. You need to be able to do a few things like listen, put your clients first, deliver on promises, offer solutions and ideas, adapt to changing circumstances etc.
Some of these are done very well by nice people, but I equally know people I’d consider quite aggressive who also do some of them well. (Unfortunately I have a friend I’d consider nice who isn’t a great listener but somehow fun to be around.)
I suppose for me its a ‘people to people’ sell, so its probably takes all sorts of people to sell to what is a world full of all sorts of buyers.
All the best
Ade
Great piece. You can learn to be less nice as I had to do it. It’s getting the right balance between Farmer and Hunter….
Adrian, what you say makes sense. However, from a new business perspective, it sometimes requires more than listening to people and delivering on promises.
Jon, learning how to be ‘less nice’ is difficult for people who have the ‘nice’ gene. However, I agree about trying to achieve the right balance b/w Hunter & Farmer.
This post resonated with me as I’m basically a Farmer. Knowing that, I also knew that I’d have to learn to Hunt if I wanted to eat. :>)
In my mind, the best salespeople are Farmers who can hunt, and Hunters who are patient enough to farm.
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