A friend of mine recently attended a trade show and heard a variety of lame sales lines all intended to get him to make a buying decision. In an email, he suggested that I write a post about lame sales lines people use in order to capture a prospect’s interest and increase their sales.
I thought this would be a fun post to write so here are a dozen lame questions and lines that make sales people look stupid. Warning: there is a serious dose of sarcasm in this post.
“What will it take to earn your business?”
Uh, maybe you could act like a professional and show me how I’m going to benefit from your product or service.
“Is price the only thing holding you back?”
No, but the fact that you think price is the most important issue shows your complete lack of sales ability.
“Here’s the phone, why not call your wife right now and talk to her?”
“Don’t you want to save money?”
No, I’m an idiot. But, please insult my intelligence again by asking another stupid question like this.
“If I could show you (insert benefit), would you be interested?”
How about you ask me a question or two so you can figure out how your product will help me?
“This price won’t last long.”
Really? You can’t come up with anything better than that?
“At this price, we’ll be sold out by the end of the day.”
Sure…and your new shipment arrives tomorrow morning.
“I don’t think we’ll be offering this incentive next week.”
Yeah, I bet it will be better so maybe I’ll wait.
“What do you know about us?”
Didn’t your CEO get sued for something?
“What do I need to do to get you into…”
You’re not “getting” me into anything with that approach.
“Have you heard about us?”
No and do you really think this question is going to make me want to listen to your sales pitch?
“What are your needs?”
Why don’t you ask me some good questions that take a bit of thought and effort and I’ll tell you.
What about you? What lame or cheesy sales lines have you heard? I love to hear them so please feel free to add them in the comments section.